“Ev-o-lu-tion (noun) – the gradual development of something, especially from a simple to a more complex form”
Note: I originally began writing this post August 3, 2019. The first sentence quotes “it has been months” but has now actually been a few years. The evolution that was already in motion when I constructed that first sentence in August, 2019 is now much more pronounced and complete.
It has been months since I’ve felt the need to write and share and pour over this laptop. My grief journey pushed me to create Coffee with Paula; later, my grief journey, after much work, eased and I found a way to begin living again.
There are significant changes that have happened since my last post in 2018, lets take a moment to get up to speed. Our world experienced a pandemic and went into a cocoon while so very many of our loved ones died by the thousands. I learned to ride a motorcycle, no longer attend the same church, lost my Dad to Covid, divorced and remarried, gained an awesome bonus son with my new marriage and a precious bonus daughter with the marriage of my son, helped manage the care of an aunt with Lewy Body Dementia until she passed and last but not least, learned to enjoy a cigar and trips to the lake. So many changes in just a few short years.
(Photo from 2/23/2020; Lady Priscilla, my persnickety beauty)
(Photo from 7/4/2021; our backyard wedding and celebratory smoke after the vows)
(Our backyard wedding on the 4th of July was a grand celebration; but exactly two months to the day, before my trike riding, Black & Mild smoking, 2nd Amendment supporting, Marine Corps Dad passed from Covid.)
Though many changes; many things are still the same. I’m still a grieving daughter at times. I am still a hospice and home health social worker. I still love my children more than life. I still love spending time with my family over a good meal and laughter, singing, sipping coffee, listening to the waves crash onto a white sanded beach while the breeze tangles my hair, reading and writing. And though the landscape has a new look, I’m still a loving wife.
(Photo from 7/10/2023; our Second Anniversary Trip at the lake)
For a couple of months now, I’ve had Coffee with Paula on my mind and wanted to revisit my old friend, my old companion, my old confidante. I’ve been reminded of the hours spent laughing or crying while reminiscing through the words that flowed into the keyboard. Coffee with Paula was my avenue for change; was also an avenue for change in others going through similar grief journeys. I want to continue being an avenue of change and of help. I commented in “What I See Now” published on October 7, 2018… “I want so badly to help others who grieve silently by grieving out loud through my blog.” With 23 years of hospice and home health social work under my belt, years of knowledge gained through continuing education/work experience and wisdom gained from personal life experience, I would like Coffee with Paula to be a continued avenue for help and for change but with expanded topics. Maybe topics such as life in general and learning to cope with all the “things”. I fully believe in the effective art of journaling and will definitely have things to say about THAT as well while we spend time together over coffee.
But, the pro AND the con of Coffee with Paula’s rebirth: I’m still the same crazy woman who uses humor to cope with life as it flies at me fast some days; so the crazy stories and ill-timed humor will still plague this blog. Ha! Giggling with anticipation at this continued evolution and anxiously wondering where it will take us as I sip yet another cup of coffee this morning. ~paula